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And God Spoke Through…An Email?

August 12, 2009


So I’ve been feeling rather Charlie Brown-esque lately, as you all know, and it had been getting better, it really had. I wasn’t dealing myself so many hard punches as normal, and I was feeling good. Then for some reason, today, it started slipping, just a little bit at a time.

I think I’m gaining weight, I shouldn’t be eating this blueberry muffin.
This annual report I’m designing looks kind of stupid. Ugh…I will never get this right.
I could dance around, wearing a giant sign that says “NOTICE ME, I’M AN AWESOME WOMAN AND  A GOOD COOK!” and he still wouldn’t notice me.

Then this song called “Beautiful” by Bethany Dillon pops up on my Grooveshark, and I start really listening to the words. I sighed and prayed, “All right God, if you think I’m ‘quite enough,’ show me.”

Literally, IMMEDIATELY, an email from a co-worker pops up and says this:


Just another way that God pursues my heart relentlessly, refusing to let me forget that I am LOVED. He doesn’t seem to run out of resources to reassure me that He will not leave, He will not stop, He will not cease in His love for me. Not in some fake, cheesy, rainbows-on-a-Bible-verse-plaque kind of way, but in a true, intimate, wildly personal, all-consuming, soul-defining kind of way.

And I need it.

6 Comments leave one →
  1. Misterwrite permalink
    August 12, 2009 5:52 pm

    Sorry–this isn’t a comment on this particular post (I haven’t even read it yet!). I just came across another blog written by a girl in her early 20’s who just returned from a short-term missions trip to India. She has some interesting things to say and I had the impression you might like:


  2. Grandma Carr permalink
    August 13, 2009 8:52 am

    Hi Caroline… On days when my confidence slips and I start analyzing the real me, it can be a big spoiler to a beautiful day the Lord has made. He has given me that day as a gift and I need to open it and see it with His eyes…I am so myopic and He has 20/20 vision. I need to cut off the ‘negative’ post haste and get out my mental calculator and count my blessings!! Soon the score reads 100 (God) to 0 (Satan). We are a work in progress…even at 74 years old. Love you, Grandma

  3. Caroline permalink*
    August 13, 2009 9:16 am

    @ Mike!

    Thanks for the recommendation! I added her to my blog reader on Google, and will give it a thorough read sometime soon.

  4. Caroline permalink*
    August 13, 2009 9:18 am

    @ Grandma!

    We so easily turn our head when God is presenting us with the gift of each day, mostly because (at least I know I’m this way) want a different gift. I want to be validated, I want to be pursued, I want to be shown I am loved in some large, ridiculous, tangible way.

    However, what more large, ridiculous tangible way can there be but the life we have?

    I am glad I have you to look up and follow, because I know you are constantly looking for God’s footsteps in which to follow.

    Love you!

  5. I love you permalink
    August 14, 2009 7:20 pm

    Beauty of mind is more precious than beauty of body

  6. Caroline permalink*
    August 14, 2009 7:51 pm

    @ Noelle!

    So, so true. Love you, pretty girl. (Pretty mind AND face. :D)

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